I realise that yesterday I led with a warning that promised today I wouldn't talk about poo, however, today I am going to lead with a similar warning, if you don't want to read it, come back tomorrow where I will be talking about new shoes, the girls new shoes to be precise, a nice, safe topic for all those that don't want to hear about poo.
Yesterday morning, both of my girls were wining, complaining, wanting cuddles etc. Neither of them could, or would, tell me why. With both girls being so clingy and not leaving me alone for even 5 minutes to go to the toilet in peace, I was fed up and close to just shouting out of frustration.
Then monster suddenly said, 'oh no' I asked what was wrong and she said, 'it's too late'! With lots of reassuring, I grabbed the potty and went to sit her on it. I was not prepared, in anyway, for what happened next. As I stripped her off, there was poo every where. It was down her legs, up her back and even on her belly? She had diarrhoea. I sat her on the potty getting poo all over it, told her not to move, under any circumstances, not even a twitch. I grabbed the monkey and shut her in the dining room, there was no way I could deal with the monkey playing with the monsters poo, I barely had the stomach to deal with this!
After getting assurances from the monster she had finished and realising there was no way I could clean her up with wet wipes, I carried her up stairs and put her in the shower, where unfortunately it just got worse! There was more, it was now everywhere. Trying not to heave I finished cleaning her up, used a whole bottle of bleach just cleaning the shower and we both had a change of clothes and I put the monster in pull ups just to be safe.
I let the monkey out of the dining room (where she had yet again made a bee line for the recycling drawers and was happily playing, or rather eating plastic packaging and cardboard!) I wish I could say our tale of poo ended here, the stench that greeted me when entering the dining room was overwhelming. I took her to the changing mat and braced myself for what I was going to find. This child also had diarrhoea, thankfully she didn't need a change of clothes or a shower, small mercies and all that! Just as I finished opening windows, washing my hands and putting the nappies in the outside bin, the monster appeared at my side and said 'Mummy, I need a nappy change'
3 diarrhoea poos in the space of 30 minutes from my lovely children. What a great start to the day!